Have mercy and be gracious unto me, O Lord, for I am in trouble;
with grief my eye is weakened, also my inner self and my body.
                                                                                          Psalm 31:9

 

Each of us has found ourselves amidst the grief process. We may have grieved the loss of a parent, a spouse, a child, a friend, a co-worker, a pet, a relationship or even communion with God. When we ascribe meaning to and allow a relationship to play a significant role in our lives, we also mentally story a future for the relationship. We mentally make future plans. The death of a loved one interrupts our future plans and halts the interaction process. We mourn our loved ones and grieve the loss of the dream; the things we can no longer say/do with that person.

God has placed in my spirit to share 5 proven tips for Managing Grief :

I. Trust God's Divine Plan

Guard your mind from thoughts of "what if"and "why", less they hold your mind captive. Respect that the power of life and death is in God's hands.

II. Take Time To Grieve

Give yourself permission to grieve the loss of the dream. Seek comfort through any form of release (e.g. talking, crying, reflecting, journaling) that lessens the pain. Do not let pride keep you from reaching out to trusted others.

III. Honor Your Loved One's Legacy

List nuggets of truth/wisdom given to you by your loved one in order to add to the meaningfulness of his/her life. Begin a praise journal in which you scribe memories of special moments; moments when your life was enhanced by his/her presence. Thank God for the time you had with your loved one. Create a legacy by continuing planned goals.

IV. Redefine Your Relationship

We know that to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. Thus, along with feeling God's presence, you can feel the presence of your loved one. Your relationship has not ended but been elevated to the spiritual realm. His/Her spirit can abide with you while awake and be part of your dreams while you sleep. Create a ritual whereby you make anniversaries special and meaningful. Choose a tangible symbol of the loved one to keep near during challenging times.

V. When Necessary, Seek Help

If you note signs that your grief has developed in to depression (e.g. changes in eating patterns, sleeping habits, functioning), seek counseling/consultation. Satan only needs an opportunity to build a stronghold in your mind. Do not allow a normative reaction to develop in to self-harm. Assert the power you have in Christ and be a good steward over your mind, body, and spirit.

*Compiled by The Potter's House Counseling Center