This excerpt is taken from:

Nothing Just Happens

Bishop T.D. Jakes - Woman, Thou Art Loosed Conference 2001

"Three women - Naomi, who is the older woman, and Ruth, who was her daughter-in-law, and Orpah, who was her other daughter-in-law. Three women who's commonality was pain. Pain is a strange company keeper. It brings the oddest people together. There is a secret fraternity that exists amongst those who have been in pain that is mind-boggling. It transcends the color of your skin. It transcends your background. When you have been through certain things, you feel for other people who have been through those things, because you relate to them. I personally don't like to have a whole lot to do with people who have not been through pain. It's nothing against them, I'm not jealous of them, I just can't relate to them. I can't relate to them and I am sure that they will not be able to relate to me. The parts of me that I need to have known, that I need to have touched, that I need to have fellowship, are tied up not in the successes of my life, but in the struggles of my life. For God has done more through my struggles. He's done more through my struggles then he's ever done through my successes. And if you look carefully at my successes, my successes are made out of the ingredients of my struggles. And you can never know my successes until you understand my struggles, because my struggles are the pathway that led me into my success. Are you hearing what I'm saying?

And so if you are going to have fellowship with somebody, you have to choose your friends and make sure that they have had something to die in their life. If you've never had anything to die in your life, you have the kind of optimism that is annoying. If you've never had anything to go wrong in your life, I don't like to hear you preach, it aggravates me, it gets on my nerves because your preaching has not been balanced by failure. If you've never had anything to die in your life don't counsel me, because you really don't understand me because you don't know why I am like I am until you've been where I've been. If you've never had anything to die in your life don't sit there and tell me be a man, take it, don't cry. You don't know what I'm taking, you don't know what I'm enduring, you don't understand. Just because you read some books and took a psych class doesn't mean that you are ready to deal with the issues of my life. There is something about going through death and loss and pain and misfortune and adversity. There is something about going through things that don't seem fair to you. That once you go through them you need to make sense of the madness in your life since you can't change what happened and you can't alter what you've been through, at least you need to be able to think that there's some greater good that's going to come out of it.

It's what they call bringing closure. To bring closure to it; to justify that I didn't go through this kind of pain for nothing. I need to be able to feel like something good is going to come out of this. If I can't do that then I feel like I'm a victim. I feel like I've been victimized and I forever feel sorry for myself and I'm not free to go on with my life, and I'm not safe to remarry again, and I'm not safe to get another job again, and I'm not safe in another church again, because I have unresolved issues out of my past; and I'm not ready to go forward with my life because I'm still tied up with where I came from. I need to know if I'm going to continue to worship God, I need to know that some demon didn't get loose in my life and wreck my life. It's not a mistake, it's not an accident, God didn't fall asleep on the job and the devil came in and wrecked the car. No, God never sleeps and he never slumbers. He's in complete control and he knows where you are, and he knows how old you are, and he knows how much time you spent, and he knows what happened to you, and he knows who walked out and left you, and he knows who betrayed you, and he knows who molested you, and he knows who raped you, and he knows who rejected you, and he knows where you are in life, and he knows about your bills, and he knows about your degree, and he knows you dropped out of school, and he knows about what you didn't get, and he knows about the health of your child, and he knows about the condition of your neighborhood. Understand that and tell yourself nothing just happens.

And so Orpah walks away. She walks away. I might have to turn this into a series because I can't get out of this. Orpah walks away, and she cries and she goes back. There are people who can walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you this - when people can walk away from you: let them walk. When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I can sit down now; I've preached. I can sit down. I don't need to make an altar call or nothing. I don't have to hoop, I don't have to make you shout, I have just preached right now. When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone. When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not of us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1Jo 2:19]

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can get super glue and you can't make them stay. Let them go. And it doesn't mean that Orpah was a bad person it just means that Orpah's part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't' keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when it's dead, David. When your boy is dead, wash your face and have another baby. You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of goodbye. I mean I've got the gift of goodbye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in goodbye. It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have he'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!! Ruth, on the other hand, coming to the crossroads, she looks at Orpah who left. Ruth turns to Naomi and says, as the Lord liveth I shall not leave thee. She makes a statement to this woman that sounds somewhere in between poetry, intimacy and borders on lesbianism.

People don't even know how to explain what Ruth said to Naomi. It makes them uncomfortable, they are afraid to talk about it, they don't want to teach on it. The same thing with David and Jonathan. Whenever same sex relationships get too close people don't even know what to say because people are so carnal they think the only thing that can tie you to somebody is flesh to flesh. Understand that Naomi was an older woman. She was old enough to be Ruth's mama. She's not attracted to Naomi's flesh. Some kind of way Naomi's spirit has gotten in her spirit. There is something that happens to you occasionally where you can meet somebody and you sense, you sense, you sense that your destiny… oh God, oh God… your destiny is tied to that person. Do you understand? Do you understand what's happening to us? Do you understand that we are spending our lives together? Has it ever crossed your mind that we are spending our lives together? That we will die after this, and that we have been joined together and we are spending our life together? Have you ever realized you can spend your life anywhere with anybody doing anything, but something happens inside of you where you sense that your destiny is tied to a ministry or to a vision and you decide to spend your life…

People keep talking about spending their money. That ain't nothing. I can spend my money and live in Chicago. But when I spend my life with you, that's all I have. I don't think that hits you. We are spending our lives together. You will not be able to write your story and leave me out. We are spending our lives together. There is no greater bond possible. Occasionally in scriptures in the whole bible you see it happening with people who are not even blood related spend their lives together in the most intimate connection possible. And theologians and scholars and preachers stumble about it because they don't know how to talk about it because they don't understand the power being joined together. How can we explain what made Elisha leave his natural mother and father and run after Elijah to wait on him? To clean his clothes, to pour water on his hair, to set up his tent, but some kind of way Elisha sensed that his destiny was tied to Elijah. How can we explain Timothy, who walks away from everything that he owns to hang out at the outside window of a jail cell as an old man prepares to be beheaded? He peeks in the window handing him books and blankets ministering to him. The young man understood, I'll never be who I was meant to be without you in my life. Do you hear what I'm saying?

There is something, there is something about the way you talk it feeds me. It's something about the way you speak that changes me. There is something about your spirit that motivates me and I'll never be completed without you and I didn't meet you by accident. I didn't stumble up and meet you. This didn't just happen. There is a reason that I'm in this place. I'm so sick of talking to people who think that everything just happens. I guess I'll go to church. I guess I'll get saved. I guess I'll move to Chicago. I guess I'll move to Dallas. That's not how it is. The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord. Your steps were ordered. If you hadn't got the phone call that you got when you got like you got it, you wouldn't even be here right now. If you hadn't made the turn that you made yesterday you wouldn't experience what you are experiencing today. God has been behind the curtain like a puppet master pulling strings in your life. It's not that you're smart, it's not that you're great; it's not that you're holy; it's not that you're perfect; it's not that you're good; but God winded you up; pointed you in the right direction; released you into your destiny; and you are here and you can't get away. Slap somebody and tell them nothing just happens. Can I talk to you a few more minutes?

This means, this means, this means that I'm up under the banner of his will. I'm up under the banner of his will. Even in the midst of death, I'm up under the banner of his will. Even in the midst of pain, I'm up under the banner of his will. Even in the midst of separation and disappointment I'm up under the banner of his will. Can I take you to the next level? Jonah was sent to Nineveh, went to Tarsus, headed for Tarsus not obeying God, got thrown off the boat into the belly of the fish, swallowed up for three days. Even though God told him to go to Nineveh, and he didn't go, he was still in the will. I'm not sure you can handle this. He went the wrong way and he was still in the will. They threw him off the boat he was still in the will. I'll prove to you he was in the will. It just happened to be a big fish. See it just happened to be a big fish swimming beside the big boat so that when men dumped him over, the fish just happened to… this is too strong. You can't take this. The fish carried him down to the bottom of the mountains with seaweed wrapped around its neck. He's thousands of feet below sea level and God sustained him. Sustained him not one day, not two days, not four days, but three days. Nothing just happens.

On the third day… on the third day the backslidden, rebellious, reprobate, disconnected, disjointed preacher comes up out of the water, and thousands of years later Christ says even as Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days so shall the son of man be in the grave. He had to get up when he got up, and he had to go down when he went down because nothing just happens. Oh God. Your mistakes were in his will. Your trouble was in his will. Your pain was in his will. I don't care what you went through. David said if I make my bed in hell, thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning and ascend unto the uttermost parts of the earth God is still there. He was with you in the middle of your trouble. He was with you in the middle of your pain. That's why Paul said, I've learned whatever state I'm in, therewith to be content. I know how to be rich. I know how to be poor. I know how to be free. I know how to be bound. You ought to shout. I don't care where you are because nothing just happens! And no devil in hell has ever been able to abort the purpose of God not once. And yes, God gave you a human will, and you are a free moral agent; but if you think that your human will is strong enough to change his divine will you are tripping. You are out of your mind. God is God.

The reason we worship him as God is because he is the CEO. He is in charge. He runs the universe. And when God gets ready to make you, and when God gets ready to break you, and when God gets ready to take you, he has never been without the power to make you yield to his will. He's never, not one moment or time, not been able to orchestrate your affairs and anointing in your life. Think about the most damnable thing that ever happened and shout 'nothing'! Think about the most embarrassing thing that ever happened in your life and shout 'nothing'! Think about the most impoverished, financially depleting thing that ever happened in your life and shout 'nothing'! Think about the worse scandal that you ever went through in your life and shout 'nothing'! Think about people who loved you and walked out and left you and shout 'nothing'! Think about betrayal on the highest level of your life and shout 'nothing'! Think about the struggle going on on your job right now and shout 'nothing'! Think about the attitude of your kinfolks and your family members and shout 'nothing'! Think about how your boss is treating you on your job and shout 'nothing'! Think about that disagreement between you and your children and shout 'nothing'! Think about your past life of sin, your whoremongering, your inappropriateness, your attitude, your dysfunction and shout 'nothing'! Shout 'nothing'!

Let the devil hear you say nothing. That devil will think he won if you don't shout nothing. The devil will think he's in charge if you don't shout nothing. He'll think he's going to win but you've got to shout 'Nothing'!"